Two Blondes are Better than One
by Luxarya
Summary: It was just another completely fine, totally normal, pre-Vytal tournament day. A completely normal, relaxing day watching two friends practice their hand to hand combat. Which of course meant someone would have to come along and ruin it. Enter Weiss. Cover Art by: rapid-artwork. tumblr. com/ post/ 139484737156/
1. In Which Weiss Is The Worst (Or Best)

It was just another completely normal, absolutely fine, pre-Vytal tournament day, filled with training and smack talk from the two blondes in the ring in front of Blake. A completely normal day watching two friends practising their hand to hand combat.

Which of course meant someone would have to come along and ruin it and considering Yang was currently occupied with Sun and Ruby was off with her "new BFF" Penny, that only left one person: Weiss Schnee. Said girl was currently sitting beside her with an insufferably smug grin on her face, an expression that was clearly the result of either the Schnee genes manifesting themselves in the embodiment of superiority or hours of painstaking practice perfecting the most irritating facial expression. To be honest Blake didn't put either of those options out of the running. She shook her head, that wasn't the point, the point was that the Schnee Smug SmirkTM was currently directed at her and it was disconcerting to say the least. Blake tried to turn back to her book but was too distracted by the sounds of pain coming from the ring. She looked up to see the two blondes currently trying to simultaneously put each other into a headlock with not much success on either end, neither looked to be tapping out though so it was going to be while of stalemate before anything happened. Blake looked back down and smiled, _God what a pair of stubborn dorks_.

"It's cute you know."

Blake turned to the heiress sitting beside her who had now adopted an obviously fake air of nonchalance as she faced the two in the sparring pit. Blake didn't want to let her get a rise out of her but it was clear that Weiss was not going to let it, whatever she was on about, go. So she rolled her eyes, took the bait and went for it.

"What's _cute_?"

"You. Of _all_ the people on the planet I did not expect _you_ to be one with a type Blake, it's just surprising."

"What do you mean by type?" She growled out the question with narrowed eyes. Weiss shot her a look as flipped her hair over shoulder.

"You know full well what I mean by type Belladonna, we've all seen the books you oh so sneakily hide under the dust jackets of Grimm Studies Vol.I to VII so don't play coy and innocent now."

Blake's eyes widened as she broke eye contact with Weiss and looked back down to her book again, feigning interest in an attempt to forget that her smutty secrets have _apparently_ not been as secret as she thought. Luckily her- no not her- _the_ resident distractions in the form of Yang and Sun broke out of their lock and resumed their explosive sparring session. Even without weapons the two had been steadily upping the heat in the ring, the rising temperature made even more obvious by the removal of all but their bottom layers of sports equipment: Yang had only a yellow sports bra and her black workout shorts left on, while Sun had removed everything bar a pair of loose black and gold gym shorts. Each punch and kick was met with a counter as they went all out trying to gain the upper hand on their opponent, they weren't quite as fast as Blake but their hitting power made up for any dodges- they gave as good as they got. Sun was more flexible than Yang but she had some fantastic footwork that mostly negated Sun's attempts at kicking her legs out from under her. Mostly, because at that exact moment Yang was swept off her feet and the two moved to start grappling as they tried to regain their footing. Watching them fight was a great experience, considering they were two of the most experienced hand to hand fighters she knew.

"You're staring Blake, again. You do know pictures last longer and they cut out the smell?" Weiss wrinkled her nose at the musty air that had filled gym in the time the spar had been going on, well she didn't have to be here if she wasn't insistent on annoying Blake.

"Look Blake I'll cut to the chase because you're either completely oblivious to your own feelings or you are so deep in denial I'm pretty sure we're going to need a full time excavation team to come and dig you out," she took a deep breath and gave the faunus a pointed look:

"You. Like. Them. Both of them."

Suddenly the world seemed to make much more sense. The more pronounced awkwardness she felt when trying to speak to them. Individually it was tolerable but recently around the two of them together she had been constantly distracted and generally struggled to get more than a sarcastic quip out. Which was a problem considering the three of them had been spending a _lot_ of time together, if she wasn't with Yang she was with Sun and more often than not they would attempt to hang out together. And Blake would have to be lying if she didn't notice the pair's _pleasing general appearance_ , oh who was she kidding, they were both gorgeous! But not only that they played off of each other well, they had a natural rhythm in their conversations and they all shared similar interests- well they all were interested in each other's interests at least. Watching Yang _literally_ light up as she told them stories from her childhood, peppered with puns naturally, made her day, as did watching Sun do sleight of hand tricks, _learned from less than reputable sources,_ he'd revealed with a roguish grin. They made her feel happier and safer than she'd ever felt before.

Oh God. She liked them. She liked Yang. She liked Sun. Both of them.

She had a type and it was hot, blonde and ripped.

 _Shit._

"Okay, _fine_ , I see your point. I- I like them. Both. Very much. What now?"

What now indeed. Weiss had successfully managed to throw Blake more off balance than any opponent she had ever encountered in her entire life. She had known she wasn't _entirely_ straight or entirely gay, that wasn't the surprise at least. The surprise was that she actually felt something deeper than simple aesthetic attraction. That's what scared her. She'd never actually _cared_ about someone before, never mind two people.

"Have you ever noticed the similarities between the two of them?" Seemingly oblivious to the girl in emotional crisis next to her, Weiss was back to her oddly calm, nonchalant voice as she waved her hand at duo for emphasis, "Yang and Sun? Such subtle details as, oh I don't know, the blonde hair, a love of hand to hand combat, the flaunting of six packs and a shared penchant for shit jokes? And, if we want to look deeper, their unwavering devotion to a certain broody cat faunus who smiles like an idiot every time one of them does something dumb in front of her? Hmm?"

Blake stared at Weiss with a dumbstruck expression on her face

"B-but I can't date them both- they like me not-"

Weiss fixed Blake with her most exasperated look yet.

"Blake, Yang and Sun are practically the opposite gendered versions of each other, barring the fact they clearly already get along, it's not going too far to say they are both at least the tiniest bit narcissistic enough to date purely for aesthetic reasons. Never mind that I'd bet copious amounts of Schnee money on the fact that they'd do just about anything for you and for your information, Schnees don't make losing bets.

To put it more bluntly: I'd think they'd be amenable to whatever type of relationship you want."

The statement was said with a tone of finality and was punctuated with another sideways glance at the ring, "Oh look at that, the blonde brutes have finally finished knocking lumps out of each other."

Weiss pointed to the ring where the two had seemingly come to an impasse- that or they were just exhausted. At that moment, as if they could tell they had Blake's attention, both blondes turned and gave twin waves with matching bloody noses and breathless megawatt grins.

Blake groaned and fell backwards on the bench. Weiss broke out that dumb Schnee Smug SmirkTM again.

"I'm so screwed."

"I'm sure the blonde idiots down there are more than willing help you with that."

"Fuck you Schnee."

"Careful Belladonna, I wouldn't want to tire you out before Yang and Sun get here."

With that last _super witty riposte_ , the girl dressed in all white stood and made for the door, leaving her contrasting friend alone to suffer in her newly realised feelings towards her two friends. Of course Weiss being _Weiss,_ she couldn't leave her angsting friend without a final snarky remark.

"Anyway, I'm pretty sure I'm not your type."

The half-hearted- and 100% not Ruby approved- hand gesture Blake aimed at her back went unseen as she gleefully left the room.


	2. In Which Blake Finds Some Courage

Weiss Schnee was officially the worst person on the planet. And not just because she was the daughter of a man who was definitely in the running for the evilest person on the planet. No, what she had done was much worse:

She had left Blake in a state of constant panic and hyper awareness.

But not any useful hyper awareness, no, no, no, that would be too easy and would not make Weiss prime candidate for "Most Punchable Person in the World".

The logical part of Blake knew that nothing about her Yang and Sun's actions had changed since before "The Talk" (No, not _that_ one- the far more scarring one delivered courtesy of Her Royal Life Ruiner Weiss Schnee) but a formerly subconscious part of Blake, a now _very_ conscious part of Blake, was noticing more things about the yellow duo.

Like how touchy feely they both were, _especially_ with Blake. The concept of personal space clearly did not exist in either Patch or Vacuo as they were constantly brushing up against her as they walked by and draping themselves across her when they flopped down in a messy dogpile in their dorms. Or in the park. Or in the cafeteria. It seemed that whenever she found time to read or flick through her scroll the two of them would find her and either drag her into one of their activities or attempt to sit with her. _Attempt_ being the key word as Blake had never met two people, human or faunus, who were so… antsy. Well not antsy but dynamic; the two were in constant motion, always taking four moves to do what took other people only one. Actually no, they were still fidgety. Despite their claims that _no we totally love sitting reading books Blake,_ she knew that both of them would much rather be doing pretty much anything else. Which actually made their attempts really cute and were just another reason that she really needed to sort out her feelings and why Weiss was definitely the worst for pointing them out.

Another thing she was just recently noticing was how few clothes they seemed to wear. Seriously, was this place a school or what? Does it even have a dress code? There are sexually confused and frustrated faunus here, please think about them before letting blondes with washboard abs walk around showing them off. Then again, covering them up could probably be considered a crime- if Blake had a say anyway.

The two of them had approached her after their sparring session dripping with sweat, showing off their abs ( _of course_ ) and demanding to know her favourite bits of their fight. They had, however, caught her on the tail end of her muttered rant at Prissy Boots including the "not my fucking type, why the fuck does she always get the last word? Is that taught in Schnee finishing school? Is it her secret stupid semblance?!" Apart from their confusion as to why she would go on to spend an unhealthy amount of time glaring at Life Ruiner Number One, nothing had changed. Nothing except Blake's sudden and extreme jumpiness around the two of them which had, to her eternal embarrassment, caused _Ruby_ of all people to ask her if she was okay. Which, on a normal day in a normal universe where a Blake lived happily in ignorance of her feelings, would have been sweet, but the moment was ruined by an un-Schnee-ly snort from the Weissicle who had overheard the innocent comment. After Ruby had been placated (read: dragged off by The "Best" Teammate) Blake was left flustered and decided to capitalise on her leader's premade excuse by leaving to go for a walk to clear her head. Naturally her alone time did not last long as Sun and Yang set-up camp a respectful distance from her before starting their new "game".

So here she was, sat on one of the many lawns around the school, watching the objects of her begrudgingly acknowleged affection rough house with Sage and Nora- a recipe for disaster on the best of days and recipe for Beacon's imminent destruction on the worst. Yang and Sun being occupied left plenty of time for Blake to be alone and _finally_ get around to reading her book. If, of course, her traitorous thoughts would kindly stop drifting off to less than savoury places as she mused on the complex debate happening inside her head; to her dismay- delight? - the pros outweighed the cons on pretty much every level. She sighed again and fell back onto the grass, the sun relaxing her slightly as she closed her eyes. Stereotypical as it was, she enjoyed lazing in the sun.

"Pining again are we?"

Blake cracked an eye open at the person standing above her and sighed again. Little Miss Insufferable had appeared to ruin her basking with that goddamn smirk on her face like she knew exactly what Blake was thinking. Before she could try and get rid of her, Weiss surprised her.

"I have pretty solid intel that they _may_ be into the idea."

Blake propped herself up on her elbows to try and question her, "How? Wha-? Who?"

"A Schnee never reveals her secrets. Or her sources."

Her interrogation of Weiss was cut short as Yang and Sun ran by hollering about some bet that they _absolutely had to finish right now, God Blake our_ honour _is on the line here- We cannot let them get away with this- Blake give us your favour oh beautiful princess, as we, your_ noble _knights, head off to battle_. She shook her head the two as they reverently bowed their own before sprinting off to harass their poor unsuspecting fellow blond. Jaune did not see them coming. He probably should have heard them though; they were... pretty loud.

"You sure do know how to pick them, _Princess Blake._ "

Oh that's right- the Great Weiss Shark was still here, smelling blood in the water and circling around the poor, innocent Blake-fish. Her glare did not phase the Ice Queen as she looked down at the faunus.

"Look, as much as this is the best entertainment I've had since that entire week after Jaune accidentally walked into the girl's shower room- and I've never seen someone so scared of towels- you are going to have to tell them. Sooner rather than later. It's not healthy for you" she finished with one of her typical pointed glares.

Huh, she was getting good at those.

With that she walked off, leaving her faunus teammate on the ground in her continued state of emotional turmoil. Giving up on the sun for the day, Blake headed back to the dorm in the hopes that maybe her fearless leader would be there to throw in her two lien on the situation.

Ruby, the adorable cinnamon roll that she was, was more than willing to talk through her predicament, despite the slight awkwardness that came from discussing her sister being in a relationship with two of her friends. However, they heroically battled through that and made progress; with Ruby's help she'd managed to come to the only solution:

Tell them.

 _Shit_. That was not what she was hoping for. Ruby patted her hand sympathetically from across the table as Blake slumped forward.

"You know it's really cute that you like them both, Weiss was right, you do have a type."

Blake lifted her head in despair and clutched her leader's hand.

"Ruby. I liked you right up until the very moment you said that. You have officially spent too much time with Weiss- she's too powerful, you need to escape before we end up with two Schnees on the team!"

Her only response was to laugh and then laugh harder as Blake's head hit the desk with a thump.

She was about to follow up when- wait did the temperature just drop? Oh of course, speak of the devil and she will appear- Frosty the Schnee-man had entered the room. At least, the radiator wasn't broken, she had too much to deal with right now without sorting out a repair person- actually wait, Ruby built Crescent Rose, right? She must be able to fix-

"Done scheduling in your angst sessions yet Blake?"

 _Snow Angel_ was decidedly _not_ living up to the nickname bestowed upon her by her hapless admirers. If only those poor bastards knew the true nature of the block of ice she had chiselled out and called a heart. If only they knew.

Not deigning to sink to her tormentor's level- totally _not_ because she didn't have a comeback- she settled for a glare. Which gave Ruby time to open her mouth and doom Blake.

"She's gonna tell them! Today!"

She was?

The monochrome duo had mirrored looks of shock on their faces considering neither of them had known of this, a plan that had apparently been conjured up in their leader's mind within the last minute. Weiss quickly overcame her shock and threw her support behind Ruby wholeheartedly, even offering to leave the room free for her to make her confession to the Yang and Sun. It was suspicious really, how invested Weiss seemed to be in this. However, Blake did not have time to ponder over any of her teammates' actions as she was shoved out the door by Ruby, who helpfully informed her that Nora was with the two of them on the South Pitch and that she should probably get a move on if she wanted to catch up with them.

It didn't take long to find them once she was in the general vicinity of the pitch- just follow the explosions and inevitably Yang and Nora would be there. She caught them in the nick of time, Yang was just suggesting heading back to the dorms as Blake walked up to them. Despite whatever explosion filled activity they had been doing before her arrival neither of them seemed to be particularly ruffled- in fact, both of them were in their natural state of artful dishevelment, an image she knew they both spent plenty of time cultivating. A stupid amount of time actually.

As they walked back to Team RWBY's dorm, the others bantered while Blake made her final decision. She was going to do it, even if it killed her. She hung back and entered the room last, staying near the door in case a sudden need to escape the room came over her.

"Guys I need to talk to you. Both of you, like now because I'm gonna go insane if I don't get it off of my chest and out of my brain." Fucking Weiss Schnee. Yang and Sun turned to look at her in surprise but before they could say anything she took a deep breath and spoke.

"I like you. Both of you, in a more than friends way and it's driving me insane being so close to you guys all the time and I need to know if you feel the same because I think you do- well it's a long story but anyway I like you," she stood awkwardly staring at them, slightly out of breath, "Please say something." Wow. Real poetic Blake, did none of those hundreds of books you've read have anything to help you here? No? Not one of them?

Yang and Sun looked at each other, having a quick conversation constituting entirely of nods and quick hand gestures, before turning back to her. Her heart stopped.

"We know."

Blake's jaw dropped. Her heart started again. She stared blankly at them.

"What."

Yang took point on the explanation.

"I mean, we weren't sure if you were into one or the other or…" she trailed off with a sheepish expression, "But we knew you had feelings for someone. So we thought we'd just stick to being your friend and let you pick, whoever lost out wasn't gonna walk out on you because you didn't want to date them. We like you even if we just had to be your friend."

"But that's not a bad thing- just being your friend!" Sun backpedalled a bit, "Y'know it'd be a bit disappointing but we're all grownups here. We coulda taken it."

Blake was still in shock.

"But how- I didn't even know until last week, how did you guys know?"

Sun answered this one, "You're _way_ more touchy-feely with us than anyone else seriously, you give Ice Queen a run for her money on the issue of personal space. In fact, she was the one that pointed it out to us. She thought it was odd." Of course she did. Of course she fucking did. She looked at Yang.

"I didn't even know I was into girls though."

Yang snorted and gave her a deadpan look as she spoke, "I've read 'Grimm Studies Volumes I to VII' Blake."

Oh god, she even made the air quotes. That's it Blake Belladonna was no more, she was gone, she had ascended.

"That's some pretty kinky shit there. Like I'm fine with it, no worries, but it also gave me a decent hint about what you like- Volume III is pretty worn around the edges, y'know, and that's about as straight as bendy straw." Oh so _now_ she chooses to be Little Miss Observant.

In an attempt to push the image of Yang reading _that_ from her mind ( _and store it for later_ ) she cleared her throat.

"Well you know I like you both but- ah- would you two, want to, well," she made an awkward hand gesture involving meshing her fingers together, causing the two facing her to smile as they clearly tried not to laugh at her, "I'd want it to be all of us. Together."

They let her finish before putting her out of her misery and nodding at her, blushing. Oh good, some others were finally joining her on team tomato face; she had been valiantly manning it solo for the past week and it had been getting lonely.

In the wake of that final acknowledgement, the three of them were in a weird triangular standoff as they all waited for someone else to be the one to make the first move. Blake's eyes flitted from Sun to Yang to Sun again before Yang huffed and walked towards her.

"I haven't waited this long to get cold feet now!"

Blake didn't have time to prepare herself as Yang wrapped her arms around her waist, drawing her into a deep kiss. Her eyes shot open before she relaxed into the kiss, closing her eyes and draping her own arms around Yang's neck. The kiss wasn't anything like she expected it to be- not that she had spent much time imagining this, _nope_ , definitely not. It was gentle and Yang's strong, _extremely_ muscular arms held her up as her legs began to give way. They quickly settled into a rhythm as both of their hands were in motion; Yang moved hers simultaneously, one to settle on her hip and the other into her hair, entangling itself at the base of her bow. Blake moaned into Yang's mouth as one of her fingers brushed lightly passed her ear, in response Yang leant out of the kiss and smiled down at Blake.

"Let's get that off."

It had not even hit the ground before Blake had her hands in Yang's hair, pulling her back into another long kiss. The bow coming off seemed to have awoken Sun from his stupor as he shook his head and moved over to the entwined girls and tapped Yang on the shoulder.

"Oi Blondie don't hog her!"

"She's all yours, _Blondie,"_ Yang spoke breathlessly, her hair mussed from Blake's wandering hands and a dazed grin on her face; Blake imagined she didn't look much different.

Sun spun her towards him before she could compose herself, caught off guard as he took Blake's hand that hand been offered by Yang. Kissing him was so different from kissing Yang, yet so similar at the same time; he chose to keep his hands cupped around her face while her hands were left to explore his _incredible_ physique. One of her hands stroked his abs as the other circled the base of his tail, figuring it would have a similar effect to touching her ears- a hypothesis he quickly proved correct. The effect was instantaneous as he growled into the kiss and renewed the connection with more vigour. They probably would have continued indefinitely were it not for a small cough from the third person in the room, reminding them that they were not alone and that their third probably wanted to jump back into the action. With a last longing kiss, they pulled apart and turned to face Yang. Well she did- Sun continued to stare at her and the combined looks of lust unnerved her a little; usually she was the one hanging around the outskirts, not under the spotlight.

"Can you two, you know," she gestured between the two of them, "I don't like being the centre of attention here, it's weird."

Her heart stepped up a gear as they shot the matching mischievous grins she loved so much towards her, before turning to each other. Yang cocked her hips while Sun stood with his hands on his.

"It looks like Blakey's directing us now, Sun."

"I bet she knows exactly what she wants- we better not disappoint her now Yang; she's probably been imagining this for a while." Okay this making fun of Blake thing was gonna have to st-

She was interrupted from her thoughts by Yang hooking her fingers in Sun's belt hooks and pulling him in. The kiss lacked the gentleness they had both shown towards her as their lips crashed together in a battle for dominance that was as evenly matched as any of their sparring matches. They definitely looked like they had been waiting to do this for a while. Their hips met and gyrated against each other as their bodies melted together and it felt like the temperature of the room rose by a solid ten degrees.

It was the hottest thing she had ever seen. Hands down. It even beat _that_ scene from Vol. III, purely because she was blessed with being allowed to witness it with her own two eyes. How could she ever have had any doubts about this thing not working? What was past Blake thinking?

"I think we broke her."

"I know we're hot but we're not 'send someone into a coma' hot."

The two blondes had finished up and were now looking at her with twin smirks. Realising she was back in the land of the living they grinned at her before moving towards her, Sun circling behind her as Yang strode forward and lifted her chin with two fingers so she was staring directly into her lilac eyes that shone with desire. Lost in her partner's eyes she failed to notice Sun press up against her until he playfully kissed then nipped at her neck. When she gasped at the sudden pressure Yang surged forward and captured her lips in a far more heated kiss than their first.

Blake could never in her wildest dreams have possibly imagined anything like this ever happening to her. ( _Liar_ , accused her subconscious.) She was in a total state of sensory overload as two pairs of hands travelled across her body while the blondes' lips worked in tandem around her neck and across her lips. Garbled noises fell from her mouth as she choked on their names trying to show her approval and simultaneously guide them to her neglected areas. It was only once a hand- Yang's? Sun's? she couldn't tell who owned it- brushed her nipple that she realised exactly what was going to happen if she let them continue and, while it would surely be fun- _really, really fun_ , she needed to put on the brakes and take a breather.

"We need to- oh- stop, yeah that's it, stop, oh wow, stop," As soon as they caught on to her words the two were in front of her, their faces showing concern while trying admirably to not look too disappointed at the sudden turn of events. Blake didn't have much time to examine their faces though, suddenly realising that they had been the only things supporting her as her legs gave way and she fell backwards onto her bed.

"Blake? Are you okay?" Sun questioned tentatively from her right side as Yang stepped up on her left side and blocked out the glare of the room's light. It was then she realised how this looked to the two of them and quickly tried to explain the situation.

"Yeah I am, sorry, it's not that I didn't like it- because I did," her face lit up in a goofy grin, "Yeah I liked that a lot, it's just I think- I think if we kept that up we probably wouldn't have been able to stop and well, not that I wouldn't want to," her face was bright red as she began to wave her hands about awkwardly, "I mean I want to but it's a bit fast. Like I didn't even know this time last week that I wanted this, and I spent the whole week in a mess of hormones and then there-" She was cut off from her rambling apology by Yang who leant in and slowly kissed her before leaning back with a smile.

"Calmed down?" Blake nodded the affirmative, "Don't worry Blake, I guess we all got a bit carried away there, y'know _hormones_ and the like," winking as she said hormones. Sun snorted. Then it was back to being awkward again, as two of the most boisterous people in the school stood in front of her suddenly unsure what to do in this situation. Yang pointed her thumb to the door, "Do you want is to let you… cool down?"

How fast she responded would have embarrassed her, had she not reached her limit of possible embarrassment around about the time she had walked in on Yang and Sun comparing ab muscles and promptly choked on her gum. Had Ruby not been there to smack her on the back to remove the offending food there may have been a grave marked "Here Lies Blake Belladonna, she died as she lived: Being sexually frustrated by blondes". Courtesy of Weiss no doubt.

"No!" They raised their eyebrows at her, "Err, I mean, we don't have to be apart. We can just have a nap. Or something. I'm pretty tired from the past week, pining is surprisingly exhausting."

Cuddling is something the three of them could do very, very well. It was comforting to fall back into the routine of arranging themselves in a messy pile on the bottom bunk, only, this time, they were not afraid to get that little bit closer and misplaced hands weren't quickly retracted with mumbled apologies and reddening faces. Instead, their hands settled wherever they felt most comfortable- Yang's stroked Blake's hair and made the stretch across to rest on Sun's front; one of Sun's rested on top of the one on his front while Blake lay on top of his other arm; meanwhile Blake's were tucked in front of her as she curled up in the middle of the two of them.

For a moment there was only the sound of their breathing in the dorm; muffled shouts could be heard from the lawns outside but nothing could pierce the serenity of the room as they lay, content just to be with each other.

"What made you change your mind about it?" Even when Sun spoke he kept his voice low, low enough that had anyone else been in the room with them they probably would not have caught his words. "Or at least, made you want to talk to us about it?" Blake rolled over to give him her full attention.

"As crazy as it sounds you'll probably have to send your thank-you gifts to, urgh, this makes me feel sick saying this, but the person to thank is Weiss."

Yang buried her face in Blake's shoulder and groaned, "Urgh she's gonna be insufferable after this." She laughed in agreement and leant back against her partner as her breath tickled her neck.

Lying sandwiched between the two drowsy blondes, Blake had plenty of time to contemplate how her life had completely changed in the past week and how, in spite of her week of worry, everything had turned out for the better. And her last thought before joining her brand new boyfriend and girlfriend in their nap?

Maybe Weiss Schnee might not be the _worst_ person in the world after all.

Epilogue:

"Are they decent? I really need to get that homework assignment I left in there but I don't want to risk seeing… anything. C'mon one of them's my sister I don't need to see… well, y'know..."

"Shut up, Weiss won't let me in to see. C'mon I just wanna know if he scored."

"Neptune! Inappropriate!" Weiss hissed, scandalised, "They're just sleeping, and they are _all clothed_ , you perv. Here's your homework Ruby and I think we should go find somewhere else to stay while this," she waved at the now closed door, "Gets sorted out."


	3. In Which Weiss Has Some Regrets

She had only really started it because she was so very tired of watching Blake pine over the two idiots. As the self-proclaimed, occasionally Leader Endorsed, Best Teammate Ever, Weiss took it upon herself to improve the quality of not just one _but two_ of her teammates' lives in one cunning and expertly executed plan. A plan her father would have probably been proud of, had he been remotely interested in the dating lives of teenagers and not currently busy twirling that dumb moustache while deciding how to ruin the lives of even more faunus.

The objective? To get her woefully oblivious teammate, a one Blake Belladonna, to acknowledge her feelings for The Sunshine Twins, otherwise known as Yang Xiao Long and Sun Wukong, and conversely acknowledge their feelings for her.

The plan? Step 1- _Subtly_ plant the seed in her mind that she liked the two of them. Step 2- Watch the seed grow as Little Miss Angsty realises her feelings. Step 3- Leave her constantly alone with the two of them. Step 4- Profit? Blake had to do step four herself. The plan was foolproof, how could it not be? Firstly, Weiss herself planned it so how could it be a bad plan? Secondly, in her (admittedly patchy) knowledge of pop culture these sorts of plans _always_ worked, and Blake (if her books were anything to go by) was nothing if not a cheesy, cliché filled, romantic at heart.

Step 1 went off without a hitch. The training ring was the perfect place to get Blake on her own but also have the brawny blondes nearby to constantly remind her of their positive features. _Really,_ Weiss thought to herself, _Yang and Sun could not have asked for a better wing woman if they tried._

However, no matter how great one person is, they cannot pull off such a complex plan- like the one she had devised, by themselves- and so Weiss had been forced to recruit more members to her mission. Ruby, bless her, was out immediately. No matter how much she would want to help she would be more likely to blow the whole plan by being either too obvious or just outright blurting it out. JNPR were willing to help, but they lacked the closeness to the situation that teammates gained. In layman's terms, they did _not_ understand how imperative it was that this situation was resolved and that it was resolved quickly. So she turned to the other teammates affected by this soon to be relationship.

It turned out that the remaining members of Team SSSN were more than happy to help their leader "Hook up with, not one, but TWO hot girls", hopefully meaning that they were as tired as she was with the suffocating sexual tension surrounding the trio- and were not just helping for the shallow reasons they stated.

Step 2 required little effort from her; only casual observations around Tall, Dark and Broody to stir the pot and remind her of her attraction. So nothing more than normal then. Admittedly, watching Blake become _incredibly_ skittish around Six Packs 1 and 2 had been an unexpectedly hilarious sequence of events. Of course she had anticipated some sort of blushing, but Blake was struggling to function when the two of them were around; anytime they flexed, got even remotely undressed, smiled at her, hugged her or even _brushed_ passed her- she would inevitably stumble or drop whatever she was holding. Even Ruby had asked if anything was wrong, which had turned Blake into even more of disaster and almost caused Weiss to ruin her own plan by bursting out into hysterical giggles. However, she did not- she was a Schnee and she had to have discipline to complete this mission.

But _seriously_ , Weiss had… _skimmed_ … those unsuccessfully hidden books of Blake's; how on earth could she read those with a straight face yet go weak at the knees if she glimpsed so much as a sliver of stomach?

After Ruby had almost foiled her plan she was let into the mission team- which now was more extensive than she had ever thought possible, Step 3 had become _very_ popular. Apparently there were plenty of people with _vested_ interests in making this relationship happen. Consequently, Blake had been left in the care of Sun and Yang as various people (completely innocently of course) disappeared off to spar, do homework, go for a walk, re-evaluate battle strategies. (Real smooth Ruby, so inconspicuous, so natural- no, they _totally_ believed you as you pathetically stuttered that out. How could they _not_ believe you as you slowly melted into a puddle before actually running away from them?)

Bringing Ruby into the fold had far more pros than cons though, her sisterly talk with Blake had relieved most of the tension that had been building on her shoulders that week. Ruby's capacity for making people trust her would be scary if she wasn't actually the most kind-hearted person the planet- that sort of power should never be used for evil. Except, _obviously_ , in the case of pestering teammate about her lovelife but that can hardly be counted as evil. And it _was_ Ruby who eventually convinced Blake to finally tell them, which Weiss was more than happy to assist with by quickly leaving the room, but not going too far, she had to ensure the success of the mission. Tailing Blake in a normal situation would have been damn near impossible, but today the usually observant girl was nervous as she headed towards the training fields to find the two problems occupying her mind. Weiss wasn't too interested in watching anything happen but she needed to make sure it _did_ happen. It only took a quick discussion between the three of them before they were off again, heading back in the direction of of the dorms- Blake still looked distracted, obviously not having told the pair anything yet, leaving Weiss to follow them again. For the good of the mission _of course_. So when she heard the words, "Guys I need to talk to you…" cut off as the door to the dorm room shut behind them she felt confident that her plan had come to its completion. Confident enough to send off a gloating message to the "Help Blake get Laid" scroll chat- name courtesy of Sage- containing all of the conspirators in her plan. Thankfully Neptune's first suggestion for the scroll chat: "What do you get when you cross a sexually frustrated nerd with two dumb blondes?" was too long to fit. Schnees should be gracious in victory but this time she felt she was due her victory dance.

After all, _despite_ Scarlet's insistence that the three of them were doomed to an eternity of sexual tension; _despite_ Jaune's complete obliviousness to said sexual tension and _despite_ Pyrrha's worry that _maybe_ they shouldn't be forcing them into this, Weiss had successfully completed her mission: Get Blake, Yang and Sun together in less than a week. Coco had bet her that it couldn't be done, but Coco had underestimated her.

With a few careful nudges in the right direction (amongst other things) Weiss Schnee had just won the Sunnybees relationship betting pool netting her a nice pocketful of lien- despite being already filthy, filthy rich. Which she _supposed_ she would have to share with Ruby since she had been the one to finally knock it into the net. Blake had never suspected a thing.

The only downside to this new relationship was the new lack of… accessibility... to her dorm room. As two of the three corners of the triangle were on team RWBY it was easier to just hang around in their room and _only_ inconvenience two people, rather than the three other members of SSSN. Weiss would rather die than admit she didn't think of everything, but she had… _maybe_ overlooked… how fast the three would jump into a more… physical… relationship. She had quickly modified her habits for the sake of her own mental health after the first incident, but no amount of courtesies could protect her from everything.

Weiss entered the dorm room, as usual, after her three knocks, prepared for pretty much anything.

Pretty much anything _except_ seeing Sun shamelessly lying stark naked on Blake's bed with his head resting on _\- between?_ \- Yang's breasts. Naturally she was also completely naked and completely shameless.

"That is entirely too much of my naked teammate and her boyfriend for me to see today," she half-heartedly covered her eyes, she had seen too much to forget already, "At least attempt to put on some underwear, please?" already knowing for a fact that neither blonde would comply with her pleading. Weiss sighed- at least Blake had a modicum of decency as she attempted to use her blanket to cover herself, even if it was a mostly unsuccessful attempt. _Why can't more people be like Blake?_ she thought- reformed teenage terrorists who understood that _maybe_ your poor teammate didn't want to see you and partners nude. Of course Yang probably couldn't understand why anyone _wouldn't_ want to see her naked. Maybe a different tactic would convince her that the dorm was not becoming a clothing-optional zone, no matter how often she "forgot" to get dressed after a shower.

"Yang, what if Ruby saw you like this, huh? Is that not going to be at least a bit scarring for your sister? I'm pretty sure _I'm_ scarred and I'm not even related to any of you."

"That's because you're a prude Weiss, relax. Minus Sun's Wu-dong," she raised her hand for a high five from the blissed out faunus, which he happily gave her, "this is nothing she hasn't seen before, "she gestured to herself and her naked companions with a flourish, "appreciate the art that is the human body Weissicle."

She rubbed her face in exasperation.

"You do know that if I did not have first-hand experience- first hand _scarring_ experience- of your general distaste towards clothes that sentence would sound very, very wrong? Actually it sounds wrong even with context, you definitely need new boundaries- Blake you're in charge of that."

The sleepy faunus looked startled at the mention of her name- her eyes going wide as she nodded an affirmative, though she seemed unsure as to what she was actually agreeing to. The tutors her father had paid for- the best that money could buy- had never covered what to do when two of your teammates get into a relationship with a guy and you keep walking in on them.

This whole situation was so surreal.

"I can't believe I'm actually trying to have a conversation with you while you three are naked. When I was arguing to come here this is not what I imagined Beacon's "Finest" would be like."

It was at this moment Ruby decided to enter the room appearing almost instantaneously at her partner's side.

"What's not what Beacon's finest would be like- OH MY GOD! WHAT THE _FUCK_! WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS TO ME YANG? BLAKE? MY EYES!"

Ruby somehow managed to leave the room faster than she had entered it, almost slamming headfirst into the doorframe as she backpedalled out of the dorm- a small pile of rose petals left in her wake the only proof she had ever been there. There was proof of her attempt to put as much distance between her and the trio though, as she could be heard literally bouncing off the walls as she ping-ponged away. Weiss turned to the bed, where the threesome looked back at her with wide eyes.

"You were saying Yang...?"

She at least had the decency to look sheepish. "Um. Oops?"

Releasing another long-suffering sigh, she began to leave the room. "If you'll excuse me, I need to go ensure that my partner doesn't attempt anything drastic to remove this image from her memory. And Blake?"

The black haired girl's ears twitched as looked nervously at Weiss as she addressed her.

"I would never have pointed out your infatuation if I'd known _this_ was how you'd repay me."

With that final remark she set off in search of her poor partner and as she followed the trail of rose petals through the school Weiss realised one thing:

She was _definitely_ the Best Teammate Ever.


End file.
